Check Please!

It's been a while and all I can say is I'VE BEEN BUSY. Being a part of the crew of the play and everything else I've had to handle has had almost overwhelmed. I must say, though, that I'm glad that I decided to become a part of the play.It seems that I'm always thrown in tech. I audition and I don't get cast but Mr Campbell decides I'll be the perfect stage manager or sound director. My ego can't help but be hurt, but then I realize that tech is just as awesome.
Just like The Fantasticks, Check Please was priceless. I have to say, though, my favorite scene was Alenson's. (His facial expressions are absolutely hilarious). Despite this, everyone was amazing. I could tell they completely emcompassed their character. Sometimes while watching I forgot it was my classmate on the stage. I love how the play was short and simple but comedic as well. I think everyone who watched it was very pleasesd by the performance. I know I was. And, to be honest, I wasn't extremely eager to attend dress rehearsals for three hours, but it was worth it. Even though my job was extremely simple, it was also fun, and I love how the song choices brought the play and characters to life even further. (Cheers for Mr. Campbell, the actors, and the crew for the song suggestions).
It was also cool that Glee, which I happen to be a part of, sang Seasons of Love. I thought it was genius that the night began with, and in a sense ended with it.
I hope the musical is just as, if more, fun. And hopefully I'm actually an actor instead of someone in the crew (just saying Mr. Campbell and Ms. Rose).
Oh and a standing ovation for Kevin, the best stage manager I have ever seen. I really believe he was born for that job. I wonder, what would the play be without him?

Today I was supposed to go stay for the Stress Workshop but there was a family emergency and I had to leave. I still want to say what stresses me out, though, to admit that I do beat myself up about a lot of things. So here goes: I'm constantly stressed out about math classes and whether or not will succeed. The worry is not whether or not I will pass. I know I can pass with at least a meager 75 even if I don't exert 100% effort and barely try. But what is that? That's not going to to get me into Syracuse. Not a chance. The fact the I don't really always understand Algebra and that I have to always try harder than everyone else does, and half the time I don't exceed over an 80 is frustrating. It's always been math. I'm someone who aces essays and the humanities. Writing is my passion and I can read a Harry Potter book in about a week if I really want to. The fact that there are times where people believe math is more important than English, being that it is in everything that you lay your eyes on really stresses me out.It's not one of my strengths and I can't help but freak out when I get a quiz back, or my homework answers turn out to be wrong. I hope it will get easier, but I doubt it since it never has ever since I can remember.

I probably should have written a reflection piece on the trip the tenth graders have recently taken but what can i say? I've been really busy. One thing that this trip has caused is a motivation for all of us to pick ourselves up and get our act together. I feel like Quarter one is always the time where the majority of us slack off. Personally, my mind is still in the summer and the thought of me being back in school hasn't fully registered. That's why I think that the time of the trip was an eye opener for all of us. Initially, I cringed and moped at the thought of us going Upstate in November where it's cold and gray. I thought, this trip will be a very beneficial-in May. But now I'm actually glad that the trip was scheduled when it was. Because of it, I know at the moment that my college will be Syracuse university.The tour caused me to really visualize myself there, being a writer for Jerk magazine and a resident of the Newhouse School. Knowing that I have to push myself at the top of my game to get to Syracuse in a few years has really motivated me to do all the stuff that no one really wants to do. I find myself get extra credit whenever I can, writing everything in my planner, studying rigorously on my days off because of my insatiable hunger to be at Syracuse. Now I know that there is a chance that I will change my college choice in the coming years, but the way I see it, that school will have to be just as good or better than Syracuse. Either way, I'm going to have try my hardest in everything i do. For me, Syracuse is the first college that I have visited that makes everything I've been working towards since the fifth grade actually real. I commend Ms. Guzman, Ms. Cartwrite, Ms. Algozo, Ms. Roth, Ms. Gala, and everyone else who planned the trip. really enjoyed it and it's safe to say that the majority of the people who went did as well. Because of it, we have a new surge of determination to have the pleasure of opening that acceptance letter to the college they truly see themselves at.

Just keep going

I'll be honest: I didn't try very hard in the beginning of the school year. I didn't really want the summer to be over and i was slacking a bit. I mean, I still tried and did what I had to do, but I could have been doing better. See in my family, I need to do better than everyone else. It isn't enough to be average or mediocre. I need to constantly push myself and I need others to push me as well. It's always a challenge, especially when you get tired or you let your confidence get in the way of doing your best. You just need to kepp on going. Continue to give life your all and be proud of yourself. At the same time, never become too satisfied with where you are and always strive for more. Take what you want in life and remember that hard works is what accomplishes goals. Only you can really change your life.

It's a Challenge

Writing for the newspaper reminds me of what Eminem says in his song white America. It's like someone is going through my words with a haired toothed comb, and it's not something I'm used to. My initial reaction is to get upset and complain how i can't write exactly how i want to. To say that they are forcing me to write what they want. But that isn't true. It's just really different from blogging, where it's encouraged to write exactly what's on your mind. It doesn't matter what they think of it because this isn't their blog, it's yours.But even a column isn't like that. It's not like writing articles. To me it seems harder. Because you have more freedom, and you have the power to voice your opinion. But the thing is, you need to learn to use it. Just writing it out doesn't do anything if it's just there.You have an audience now. With great power comes great responsibility.

Farewell

Farewell my friend I barely knew
you gave us hope to strive for more
your jokes funny intentions true
it was your class that we adored.
I'll never forget these things I've learned
forever you'll be a part of us.
It was a hard choice to leave we heard
no matter what happens it is you we love.
You taught us the meaning of reading the lines
through laughter and happiness we never knew
it was all the others that we left behind
because of the lectures that had us enthused.
A part of our family you'll always be
no matter what happens we're here open arms
we'll miss you Ms. Old like a tree misses leaves,
it is here that you'll stay-
in our minds and our hearts.
-Dedicated to Ms. Old <3

It will get better

What Mr. Baker spoke to us about today at Common Ground was very moving and influential. I want to say that I respect him for his amazing courage. By telling us something that personal willingly shows how much he trusts us and that he is not ashamed of his orientation. We were exposed to diversity and differences and I think one of the steps to changing the epidemic of intolerance is getting rid of it our own community first. We can make a difference with each other and outside of our school if and I think Mr. Baker began the cycle. Like he said, and all the others who made a video did as well, it will get better. Thank you, Mr. Baker for being honest and exhibiting bravery and leadership today that will surely stay with us forever and motivate us to be apart of the change that WILL make it get better.

Saber sentinel, here I come

I am proud to announce that I am columnist for the Saber Sentinel. No I don't write articles, I write columns. Just think of me as Owen Wilson from Marley and Me. I write what's on my mind that I hope will make people think. I want my columns to be a fair and true representation of our experiences in the high school. If it's up to me, my voice will be the one to shed light on how it truly feels to be a teenager in UCHS. How it feels to balance a social life and academics, what's it like to get your heart broken by a guy that happens to be in your advisory, battling with who you are and boxes people put you in, realizing the hard way who your true friends are. Because in the end, high school is a juggling act that feels as if it will never end until all of your balls have fallen on the floor. If it can be my words that express these things, then hopefully people won't feel alone because of the constant reminder that there are people who feel excactly the way they do. And of course it's the cherry on top that I adore writing , and this is perfect practice for the future years of making it into my lifelong career +^-^+

Someone is missing

Our community has lost someone today:Ms. Old. It breaks my heart that I have to type this and then see it on this blog. It doesn't matter if we've only known her for for a few weeks, the fact remains she was a part of our family, and now she's gone. I don't know why she's not here anymore, but wherever she is, she should know she will be missed and will be remembered forever. No matter what, she can always come back, because to me she revolutionized what it meant to learn English. She was one of the closest teachers we ever had to what I envisioned a professor to be. She was loved by everyone, and now everyone is devastated that she won't be returning. It's horrible that her name has been added to the list of amazing teachers that we feel left too soon. But like those teachers, she will be remembered and her presence will be kept alive. We will never forget her vibrant personality and hilarious jokes, her captivating lectures and unique debates that she introduced to us. We love you Ms. Old, forever and always.

The beginning

Fans, I'm proud to say that my posts have made a difference. Yes,I'm serious, I came to school today to the news of the HEADBAND POLICY CHANGED. Now it may just be me being egotistical (which is really rare) and the teachers may have just realized that their rules and headbands were a tad extreme. I'm going to be arrogant and say that it was me that partly changed it. If I changed this (or helped) imagine all the other issues I can change with my posts. I don't know if anyone knows, but my dream is to change the world with my words. This is the beginning to my journey to the dream I've had since I've been about ten. Someone really near and dear to my heart told me if you want change demand it. That's exactly what I plan to do (civilly and professionally of course). It's good to know that the school is somewhat open to change, if we're open to communicating our thoughts and issues.

Finding yourself

When you get to high school, you realize that everybody usually has one thing in common:wanting to fit in (to an extent). It's easy to get yourself lost in the drama and the hunger for acceptance from everyone around you. I mean, it's completely normal. Sometimes it's a really cute boy that you like but they don't know who you are. Sometimes it's that you have an image of yourself that you wish you were: the jock that got all the girls, the eccentric one that didn't fit in anywhere but could care less, the gorgeous brooding guy with deep poetry. If you let it consume you, it will. It's easy to tell people to be acccepting of yourself, but it isn't always easy when you're in the situation. You as a person need to find who you are and accept your flaws, and realize that you probably won't fit into any boxes, but it's how life goes. do what makes you happy and even though it's really hard, don't worry about other people think.

Can't Wait for Mondays

It's a secret, but I've never really seen Glee the show. I do know one thing, though, that I love to sing, And if I can sing and have fun, you can count me in as a member of the new Glee Club. Plus, it gives me something to look forward to on Mondays. If anyone is curious, Daysha is the mastermind behind the Glee club, so thank her for the awesome idea. I can't wait for singing and learning how to, perfect preparation for the highly anticipated musical (wink wink) and of course the band that's being formed. I can see it now, us singing Fever 95 and Michael Jackson, Paramore and Mcfly (because they definitely need more recognition) Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber and anybody else we want to sing and perform. Needless to say I can't wait!!!!

I have a question

I have a question: is a polka dot head band distracting? Because according to the school, wearing it requires a punishment. For wearing a polka dot head band. I guess I was wrong when I thought that people would look at my face when they looked at me. Apparently that's not the case. No, when people see me they're fascinated, no mesmerized by my head band. For that, it's only fair that I get a violation, right?

I hope my sarcasm shows through my words because trust me, it's there.

Now, is that something that really needs to be addressed? To me, there are other issues that should be dealt with. Like the band that's being formed, how will we get our instruments? And why isn't there a girls basketball team? No I guess the executive decision is to chastise someone (that person being me if you didn't already notice) for trying to make her hair look remotely decent. What I really don't understand though is why no one told me to take it off when i came into the building instead of at the end of the day.But hey that's UCHS for you. Extreme rules and lots of responsibilities, that's the way it goes. Sometimes it's like we're not even in the tenth grade. Really, it's bad enough I'm short and I don't look like a tenth grader. We don't have to be treated like we're still in WCCS too.

Rock band camp was Awesome

Thanks to Ms. Lynch, I got to go to a girls rock camp this year. Picture Camp Rock the movie but not a sleep away camp and nobody would randomly start singing and dancing. It was in a building and full of a bunch of cool musicians and instruments and dance parties. I got the pleasure of playing the guitar (because it's awesome) and being in a band for a week. All I can say is too bad it was only a week. There were guitars and drums and basses everywhere and the teachers were usually in there own bands like The Homewreckers. I saw my first punk and metal performances and my guitar teacher taught me to play Green Day songs. There was band practice and workshops that taught you how to make band art and make zines. It was one of the best weeks of my summer and is one of the reasons I'd like to have a band in UCHS, the other reason being that I learn, live, love rock.

Fresh Starts

It feels as if forever since this blog has been written on, but it hasn't been that long. Truth be told, it's only been about two months since the last day of school, where we were still at Wilson Street and crowding in Donut Connection and hanging out on Broadway. It almost feels as if everything has changed. New school year, new Mcdonalds to buy smoothies and mcflurries in, new students to be role models for. all I can is it will take a while for us to get accustomed to this beautiful school that seemed to only exist in our dreams until now. It's amazing how easily everything can be so similar but yet so different. UCHS is still a family, and I think it's safe to say we always will be. Now, though, I think we''ll become stronger now that our dreams and hopes are finally materializing in front of us.If this is our high school imagine how breathtaking our college campus will be, which amazingly, is only three short years away. I never thought we would be lucky enough to have a rooftop, enormous gymnasium and a cafetorium (did we invent that?) and everything else that is ours. The way I see it we now have no excuse to not prove everyone wrong and not exceed all the goals set for us.It's our job to take our abilities and resources to the next level and show everyone out there who don't know who we are that we exist, and they better watch their back.

I had a breakdown

If it's one thing everyone in UCHS has experienced is a breakdown. When you have as much stress as we do it's almost impossible to not lose it sometimes. Something in your head clicks, and the only thought that runs through your mind is" I can't do this anymore". It's really hard, school. It may seem as if all we do is complain. Complain about the rules and the homework. Complain about how life is unfair. But that's what it always is. Imagine you study every day for physics. You sit there for at least an hour redoing your problems from class, drilling the kinematics equations in your brain, but when you take a test it's like they start swirling and no matter how hard you try, the result you get back is a 56. It's aggravating, to give all this effort and see no progress. And that's what really brought me down today. The fact that this entire year feels like a waste because my grade in physics is a 71. I know I'm being hard on myself, but it's a habit.

Find something to keep you going

To me, the hardest thing to find is motivation. My dad likes to tell me that potential is nothing if you don't have motivation. You need something to keep you going. Some people just naturally have the tenacity to continue to fight till the end no matter what. Like my mother. I, on the other hand, have a bit of a problem when it comes to attention span. Boredom is my worst enemy and music and writing are my only vices. The only way to survive life and everything that comes with it is by finding something that you can look forward to and sticking to it. Especially with school, where you can become drowned in your stress, it's good to have something to keep you going. If you don't, you can go insane with anxiety, or just stop caring altogether and become complacent. That's one of the worst things that can happen, being satisfied with being mediocre. You should always strive for more, even though it's really hard. Always have that dream in the back of your mind that will keep you on your toes. For me, my dream is me standing in front of a crowd with a microphone in myhand, and my words from my heart on the tip of my tongue as I sing it out. That's what I think about when I don't want to do physics homework, or I want to fall asleep in Global (sorry Mr. Baggs,don't take it personally).
Everyone should have one. I just think about it and my skin comes alive and my heart is rejuvenated. That's my something that keeps me going.

The exception

Fake people are everywhere. I used to wonder what being fake meant. Did that mean that you were made synthetic or something? As I grew older and met new people, though, it was an inevitable fact that I was faced with people who aren't genuine. People who will plaster a smile on their face when they're around you but once you leave their mouth is full of all the flaws they notice. It's an unfortunate part of life. You can't have everyone like you. If you revolve your life around pleasing everybody, in the end you won't be pleasing anybody, especially yourself. It's normal to want to fit in. I spent my entire middle school year in that stage. Everybody wants to be popular and cool once in their lifetime. Eventually, though, you realize there's more to life than being able to boast that you're the name in everyone's mouth, or how many facebook friends you have. You need to accept you for you, and that's what high school is all about. It's about discovering who you are and being proud of it. I've been in the place where you have this false image of yourself that in the back of your mind you know you'll never live up to, but for some reason you still strive to be it. It's hard to get out of there, trust me. When you do, though, you'll realize how fake and ubiquitous the majority of people are. Everybody follows the trend like a herd of sheep just so they can have something in common with everybody else. Like my dad says, "you have to be the exception". Find yourself and learn to love you. Eventually you'll stop caring about what other people have to say. You'll know when your being consumed by peer pressure and when your not being yourself, and find the people you can really be friends with, the ones that don't make you think twice about what you say in fear of harsh judgment. Like Audio slave sings," To be yourself is all that you can be".

We're almost there

Can you believe it? We're almost there, to the end of the school year. It's weird how everything seems to drag on for an eternity till the end and you look back and it's flown by. By the time we know it, we'll all be graduating with tears in our eyes and early acceptances to colleges like Harvard and Stanford. It's already the fourth quarter and the flowers are blooming, even though I could have sworn just yesterday I was an eighth grader on a plane going to Costa Rica. But that's how life is. It zooms by without you if you don't advantage of every second. Next year we'll be sophomores. We'll be meeting new people, getting smarter, and maturing even more than we've already had (well most people.)I wonder, am I the only one who thinks about how they'll be when they get older? What friends they have, how many broken hearts they have acquired.
High school is definitely not what I would have expected. It's a lot of late nights and hard work. It's frustration and social sacrifice in order to succeed. But I've learned it's also finding yourself. It's about realizing you don't fit in into the crowd and accepting that you're unique. It's about realizing what you're calling is and doing everything you can to make sure it comes true. As the years progress, I know it's inevitable that people are going to change and life is going to get harder. High school is the chance for you to get ready to life alone. When you're on your own, there's no one but you who's going to pay your bills. You're going to have to get a job and make something of yourself, unless you're okay with mooching off of your parents like a leech.
I personally wouldn't be able to live with myself.

Writing club is my new favorite class

Saying that I love writing is an understatement. It's my escape, my vice. Ever since I can remember, it's what I love to do. I think it's safe to say that I'm known in my school for being a writer. And I'm proud of it. So of course I'm going to be a member of the writing club. Not only that, one of my best friends is the leader of it, why wouldn't I join? To me, writing is an art. It's expressive and unique. Something you can make your own. It's a beautiful thing, pouring your feelings onto a piece of paper, and watching your emotions spill everywhere. The best part,though, is the weight lifted off your heart and chest when you finally say the right words. The words that perfectly express what you're feeling, even if it's for a moment. I've always been the type of person that found it easier to write what I felt first before actually saying it. It's like there's a big knot of thoughts in my head that don't come always come out right when I open my mouth. But I can always say what needs to be said with a pen and paper. It's a curse and gift at the same time. It's been a struggle, learning to speak- really speak, when there's something to be said, not being afraid to have others hear it.My theory is the only reason I'm good at writing is because it was my only way out. So naturally I became good at it, but only because my mouth didn't work.

Chasing perfection

My dad likes to tell me : "chase perfection knowing you'll never get it.In the process, you'll be the next best thing, excellent. When he told me that, I was in middle school. I was insecure and yearning to fit in. I had no clue what he was trying to tell me, and to be honest, I was so caught up in my life I didn't try to figure out what he meant. Chase perfection? What was that supposed to mean? To me, he was trying to tell me I wasn't good enough. I would never be good enough because he wanted me to be perfect, and who was I? Only Michelle. Well. I finally get it, years later, when I'm older and more mature. He didn't want me to be perfect. He wanted me to be the exception. If you look around, there are so many people who are fine with being just okay. But you shouldn't just want to be okay. You need to be bigger than that, because you only live once, and you don't always get what you want. To get close, though, you have to bust your hump. Because in reality, it's not the people who are mediocre who get what they want. Life isn't some fairytale where some random prince from far far away sweeps you off your feet and suddenly everything is okay. The most successful people are the people who never give up, who take the nrrow path to what they want. If you want to be remembered, you need to give people a reason to remember you. I mean, there are like a trillion people that are on this planet, and if there's nothing different about you and them you're going to be a part of a huge blob of nothing. You need to be something, and the only for you to do that is to be yourself and and live life to the fullest. Chase perfection but make sure you know you'll never get it. In the end, you'll be excellent.

Watch out world

So I'm back. I couldn't blog on Monday. (If you notice, I never blog on Monday. It's because I have no internet access on Mondays). Anyway, on Monday, I had the honor of meeting some students from Achievement First. It was good to see some new faces that will be sharing our school for the rest of my teenage years. We were interviewed (I'm getting famous a little more every day). They asked us the usual questions:what we liked about the school, our extracurricular activities, and every other question I forgot because I have short term memory loss. I've gotta say, though, I'm excited to meet everybody else. I can really envision myself hanging out with the other kids from Achievement First. You know when you meet some people and you know- you just know that you and those people probably won't get along. Fake smiles and nods will be as social as it gets. It's like a feeling in your gut. I didn't get that feeling. Granted, it was only a few students from the school, my instinct says they're going to be cool people. I say, it will be good to have new people in our school. I mean, I love my classmates, they're like a second family, but there's only so much you can take of the same people. Like they say, same thing, different day. And just imagine all the awesome activities we can do now that there's more people. I know, I shouldn't get all excited. We're still separate schools. Very different yet somewhat similar. But imagine all the change we can do now that there's more than 38 teens. We can definitely change the world now. Planting trees and all that good stuff. So make way, world. First Achievement and UCHS are coming through. Get ready to ooh and ahh at our excellence and originality.

I'm freaking out here

My heart's beating so fast it sounds like humming. My mind is racing so fast I'm getting dizzy without even moving. My hands are shaking while I take gulps of air like a fish out of water.

Nobody told us we were having quarterlies.

To me, this is time for me to fail. I know,me Shelle, the happiest girl in school should be excited or something. First of all, I'm not always happy. Nobody's always happy. (Well there are exceptions). If you think I'm happy all the time then you're sadly mistaken. You obviously don't know me. In the end though, it's easier to forget about what really makes you upset and just smile. Distract yourself from your inner insecurities and flaws as much as you can. It would be a lie if I said I didn't hide behind my smile sometimes. (That reminds me of the lyrics to Paper Wings by Rise Against.)Anyway, back to the quarterlies.Time flies by, and when I found out the news, I wasn't all that thrilled. Hours of sitting and taking a bunch of tests for numerous classes. I hate how tests are ultimately the final test of how you succeed in your education. Have you ever been in the situation where you do all your homework and classwork, but for some inexplicable reason your mind blanks when you take a test? It's like a disorder. Inevitable failure on anything of importance syndrome.Yup that's what I have.I just get really distracted easily and my mind flies by before it really registers in my head what I was thinking. Boredom is my worst enemy.
I feel like the quarterlies are going to roll around in seconds flat and no matter if I study for hours at a time, when I sit in that seat and pick up my pencil, anxiety is going to consume me and wash out everything else in my mind.

The weirdest thing happened to me.

I was on the train with my mother and sisiter. I was looking for a seat so I could memorize the notes to my song for the piano recital. (Didn't memorize it during the break and now I have to pay the price). So lo and behold, there was an empty seat next to someone. The only reason I actually noticed it was because the woman sitting next tio the empty seat was motioning towards me. Once I finally realized she was talking to me, (like five minutes after) I sat down and was about to take out my When the saints packet. Well I guess this person had a different agenda, because she started asking me questions. Questions like what school did I go to and where iot was located. So at first I was thinking in my brain, okay it's just a curious person who wants to see where I attended high school. I was used to this. You have to be when you've worn such spiffy uniforms for your entire middle school career. It turned out she worked in a private school. Whether or not she was a teacher I couldn't tell. For all I know, she could have been the counselor, but the questions she was asking me were what a teacher would ask me. She was asking me what courses I took, how long the hours were whether or not I was satisfied with the school and so forth. After a while she kind of started lecturing me about the importance of uniforms. I remember her saying "It may not seem like it now, but when you get older you'll realize uniforms were for the best. They make sure you stay completely focused on your studies. Don't waste your life because on what's in style because every minute counts". No matter where I go, I get lectured by someone. It's weird how I knew she worked in a school. She sounded like a physics teacher. I consider myself famous for getting so much attention from a stranger. Granted, she would've never noticed me without the uniform. I guess it give me charm, my uniform. But don't worry fans, I gave UCHS a good name. You can always count on that. You may see that lady as a visitor in school one of these days, and it will be all because of me. Then I'll be able to say to people, hey I know her. We talked on the train once andI owe it all to my uniform. it helped me make a new friend and boost the reputation of the school. Thanks uniform.

Everything good's gotta end eventually, right?

I've got to be honest with you fans. I don't want to go back to school. It just doesn't sound all that appealing to me- going back to sitting in desks and raising your hand. It's funny how we all complain how monotonous our breaks are until it's the last day. Then we take advantage of any possible chance to have the last bit of freedom. It's a fact of life, everything good's got to end. I'm not trying to say school is a prison. Goodness no. It's just that-how can I put this-there are more fun things in life. My dad says that you work hard now to play hard later in life. It gets hard- though- staying positive when you're counting the days till the next break. So now we have to wait till like summer vacation to have a day off. At least we have something to look forward to for the rest of the rest of the year. That and the Atlanta trip.

Applebees and a new shirt just made my day.

I was really looking forward to going to see a movie today. I was all ready to see the movie Remember Me and cry by the end while eating nachos, but to my misery nobody else in my house likes Robert Pattinson (my whole family is Team Jacob). So we didn't see a movie, and I was planning to sulk all day and drown in my sorrows, but it didn't need to, because today was actually fun. My family and I took a trip to the famous Long Island (is that a state?) and we went to Applebee's. Even though all my friends say Applebee's is the worst restaurant since White Castle (which I happen to love) I adore Applebee's and their spinach artichoke dip and way too sweet lemonades. I have a lot of good memories in Applebee's, like when my aunt and I saw Mama Mia and went to eat there just because we wanted to waste money in the city. Not that it's that expensive. I do remember one time, though, I was with my parents and my sister and we were shopping and decided to treat ourselves to some Applebee's. Well, they made the decision without me, but I agreed, so I could care less. Well, to our horror, we sat in that booth for a whole half an hour without someone coming to us and even introducing ourselves. I was dumbstruck, and my dad was outraged. Needless to say, we left and ended up eating pizza and buffalo wings at Pizza Hut. Well, back to today. After stuffing our faces with appetizers and soda, we went to Walmart (you ever notice there isn't a Walmart in New York?). I guess my aunt bribed me with food because we spent the next 2 hours in the clothes section looking for a red shirt for a baby. At least I got a shirt that makes me look like Demi Lovato ( who is one of my teen idols). That just shows how being a good person and holding tongue when you want to yell at your aunt to hurry up can get you a reward. The funny thing is the red shirt that we finally found was for a 2 year old, not a one year old. Thank god for that shirt or else I would've lost it.

All the small things

The highlight of my day was falling asleep on my dad's bed with my sister, dad and dog (yes my dog). It's times like those that make me appreciate all the small things, like playing with your little sister and waking up from a nap with your dog licking your face. These things don't happen everyday, and you need to take advantage of all these opportunities because life only comes around once. That's what my dad says. Sometimes you've got to put down your phone and take out your head phones for a second because before you know it you'll be in college and you'll be so busy with life's obstacles that you won't have time for all the small things. On day my dad was lecturing me, he told me he knows that it's inevitable that we'll grow apart, but hopefully when I'm older and less self absorbed we'll get closer. He said one day I'll understand why he was always so hard on me. That really annoys me because I'm going to have to wait till I'm in my twenties, married and successful to finally get why my dad didn't let date at fourteen and ground me for getting the grades I do.That's how life is, though. At least for me, I never really understand why people do the things they do and say what they say till a while has passed by. Have you ever been lost in thought, brooding over you don't know what and WHAM you have a revelation. You think ohhh that's why he said that, or he did like me last year. Sometimes in life, the signs are slapping you in the face, but you don't get it till your forced to face the facts. How I got to this topic is beyond me. This is what I mean when I say I don't get to my point till the end.
I start talking about a small tidbit of my day then next thing I know I get all philosophical like I'm Socrates' niece or something.

Spring Break here we come

Hey all my fans, Shelle has entered the blog to add a post. It's great that it's Spring Break, right? I always wondered if Spring break for some people was like in the movies, where you go to a beach with all your friends for the entire week and everyone sees you on MTV. Does that actually happen? I want to ask if anyone has anyone has ever done that.(Add that to my bucket list).Usually I spend my break doing absolutely nothing and homework (since we have so much.). It's funny how everybody plans to do all these things they never do during break, like clean out your closet, but they never do it. Personally, I just wait till the last second to anything of importance (other than homework).So now this blog is going to be a record of all the things I need to do during the break, and everyday I'll see if I check anything off of my list.

• Do all of my homework before the weekend (it's not as easy as it seems)
• Watch a movie with my beloved aunt at the theater (I want to see Remember Me or The Runaways, which of the two would you recommend, fans?)
• Eat at Red Lobster (Can you believe I've never been there?! I'm an Olive Garden kind of girl.)
• Finally organize the hurricane that is my book bag.(there's going to have to be some encouragement to do this).
• Write some more songs (This won't be hard)
• Listen to some music (Like Mcfly, Paramore, Rise Against,Disturbed, Flyleaf, blink 182, Metallica, Eminem, ACDC...)
• Skateboard
• Blog (of course,how else would I stay on track)

• Do laundry

So I expect my followers to see if I can meet my goals, even the ones i don't want to do. You have to be my impetus!!!

Something to Look Foward To

Well, it's 10:00 at night and Im sitting on the dining room table and I'm writing this post while listening to Rise Against. I have to say, I've come to enjoy posting almost everyday. To be honest, it gives me something to look foward to. Not saying my life is so uneventful that the only fulfilling thing I do is blog. It's just that it helps to be know know matter how banal or maddening my day is, I at least know I can go home and rant about it on my computer and people will read it. Unlike a diary (which I only write in like once a year oddly) I can have my voice heard. It's amazing. I remember when Ms. roth first presented the idea.I was outside one morning shaking her hand, and she told me about how she thought I'd be the perfect person to take on this project. I thought, well how interesting. I get the privilege of reporting what happens in school. Once again, my judgement was dead wrong. ( I'm notorious for this.) It's not just me writing about about what happens in class. If it were that, I wouldn't have a blog, I'd be in charge of the Sentinel or updating Edline. I have tried, I mean really tried to write about exactly what's happened in my day, but by the end, my eyes are drooping and my finger instinctively hits the backspace key. To me, a blog is not like a journal. It's not to say what is happening, but to be the real you, to reflect on life in general, to be witty.Maybe I think this because personally I can't write out what I'm feeling simply. I need to make it reflective and personal at the same time. Usually when I write, it's because I have some point to make.It's like sometimes there's a pain in my chest that won't go away till I write what's going on in my head, and I don't really get down to what I've been meaning to say since the beginning till the end. To me those are the only best ways to write. Like Ben Franklin says , "Speak when there's actually something of importance to say." Wise words from a legendary hero.

Just in case I get famous

I've realized that I've never fully introduced myself. I guess I didn't think I should because this isn't only about me. But then i thought, " how can I post on this blog to people who may not know me? Granted, it may be cool to have a bit of mystery between the reader and I. I also didn't think it was that imperative for me to make a formal introduction if the few people who actually knew this blog existed pretty much saw my face every day. But then i decided, hey, in the slight possibility that I become famous for my writings for my posts, I want my fans to know a bit about me.
My name is Shelle (short for Michelle if you didn't know).Music and writing are my vices to life. I'm a hopeless romantic at heart and I spent the first twelve years of my life with my head in the clouds and my nose in a book. It took me more than half of my life trying to fit into the box of Perfection for me to finally accept myself as the unique, quiet and emotional weirdo that I was born to be. My best friend has a confident bubbly soul that always has the consideration to be brutally honest with me since a penchant of mine is running away from the truth. The fattiest thing I eat is fried oreos and I will eat anything in the entire world except olives. The only breakfast I can have every single day if I had to is grilled cheese and choclate milk. My favorite poem is The Raven by Edgar Allen Poe because when I was a kid my dad would read it to me right before I went to sleep every night. I'm a rocker at heart, and if you ever need the lyrics for any Mcfly song I'm the girl for you. Every time I post I listen to Paramore's album Brand New Eyes. When I get angry I love to listen to Eminem, who I will tell anyone is one of the greatest rappers alive. Lastly, the most personal thing I have is my songbook.
Well that's me in a few lines. I feel so famous.

A Spring Dance to Remember

I've got to be honest. When I first heard the details of the spring dance I wasn't that excited. I mean I love the experience:buying a new dress, getting accessories that would match my outfit, all that stuff. But when I heard about the admissions fee and the fact you had to aparantly pay for your food, I thought that was ridiculous. I never really heard of having a dance where you had to pay to get in. Regardless, I had to stick my foot in my mouth. Here i was, judging the dance before it even happened, and it turned out to be awesome.Here's the stuff I loved about it because it would be too long if I didn't list them out.

1. The cupcakes(supplied by the one and only Kinyanna Evans)
2. The music(a round of applause for Chris O.)
3. The performances(who knew Cash Records could rap so well?)
   
4. All the pictures
5. The look on everyone's faces when She Fox and She Wolf made their grand entrance
6. The runway show

These are the just a few things that made my day on Friday. What I'm trying to say is that the dance was another beautiful memory to add to my young life. When i'm old and have kids, I'm going to share this day to everyone who will listen.

Never Do Your Nails in th Morning

I've got some advice (I like giving advice). Never do your nails in the morning. Especially if you still have streaks of all the colors of the rainbow still on them. It may seem like it's a good idea to paint your nails a nice shade of green if you miraculously have ten minutes before you have to leave the house to catch the train. I'm telling you now,though, don't do it. Because even if those streaks are almost gone, I can almost guarantee that those streaks will be visible under the new color. I should know about this because I've experienced this, numerous times. In this situation, the saying practice make perfect does not work. Trust me, no matter how many times you try this, you'll still have smudges on your nails. It's funny that school is like badly painted nails. It needs to be done with precision, and it's really frustrating when you give something your all and end up messing up everything at the end. Like when you take a test and you're on the last question, and it has five parts. It's worth ten points, and you feel like pulling your hair out because you just spent an entire hour of your life sitting and circling letters, and whether or not you fail depends on this ten point question. You can't help but out end up staring at the page for five minutes till it goes blurry. Granted, it doesn't take an hour to do your nails, but the precision you need is ridiculous. No one can really master it.The hilarity of it all is that I need to change my nails to red after I finish writing this because eye burning green does not even remotely match my dress for the dance tomorrow.The dance that I have to pay two dollars to get in. Not to mention" food will not be provided without a fee". Let's hope no one forgets their money. It would really suck to be the only one hungry while everyone is munching on pizza and slurping down kool-aid. I wonder, will there be a juice bowl? I guess not,, because then people could take juice for free. Imagine the horror that would create. Gasp at the wasted profit.

Somebody once told me

To be honest, I don't really know what to say in this post. I guess I can reflect some more, but there's mot really much to say. Well, I guess that's a lie. I could go on for hours reminiscing on the past, thinking about all the things I've learned over the past five years, the friendships I've developed, the drama Ive caused and learned to steer clear from. All the facts about trees and world history I've ingested. It's crazy how all those things end being forgotten eventually, but you always remember your first crush and your best friend's favorite color. You remember lessons and anecdotes your professors tell you. I guess what I'm trying to say is that school is more than work.It's more than your GPA,even though that's really important. Your parents and all these teachers tell you school will add up in the end, but you don't really believe them till you're older. If your teenage years are the best years of your life (or so they say) why don't you go above going to school, or defying anything that has to do with schools.
High school is for finding who you are.
Someone once told me that soon enough I'll be able to know who I am, not who people think I am, or what I wish I could be. After that, there will be no turning back. It's really hard to accept that you aren't happy with who you are, and your teen years is your chance to organize your priorities as a student and a person. Learn what you want to do with your life, and start the rigorous journey to live your dreams.Let's face it, staring up at the clouds will only get you so far.

Clean Slate

I remember on the first day of school, listening to my teachers talking about having a clean slate, a fresh start. All the things that happened in middle school are wiped off, they said. I was sitting in room 301 , writing all my regrets on a paper to throw away. I wrote all my mistakes I kept harbored inside me, all the things that I did that I never forgave myself for. Most importantly, though, I admitted the thing I never thought I would say. All through middle school I put myself in a box, the box of being the perfect person. I blamed the people around me for only perceiving me as the one who always did the right thing, the girl who never got lower than a 90 in any class. The thing is, I saw myself as this too and even though I dreaded the disappointment of the people surrounding me that were breathing down my back constantly, it was me who I was afraid of disappointing.I was trying to mold myself into something I would never become, a statue that was incapable of making the wrong decision. In middle school it felt like the cycle of my trying to be the epitome of perfection would never end, but high school, I discovered, was my chance to be proud of me, not the person people thought I was, the person I yearned to be. I've learned over the course of this year that perfection is impossible, but anything other than my best is inexcusable. If I learn to balance myself, my interests along with the importance of excellence in academics, I will no longer feel suffocated by my own criticizing eyes. I'm glad for this activity.Because of it ,I have a clean slate with everyone: my peers, the teachers and most importantly, myself.

How It All started

I guess I should start from the beginning: an August summer day, a crisp new uniform, perfectly curled bangs, and undying excitement for high school. The four years that everyone looks forward to, the best years of your life. Well nobody tells you hard it all is. One minute it's the end of the first day of high school, and your in McDonald's buying dollar fries and saying hi to your crush you haven't seen all summer, and the next thing you know, you're sitting in the cafeteria across from your House Leader and next to your mother talking about how you have a 75 in physics. There's only one question running through your head:what happened? Last you remember you had an 85. This isn't how high school should be. You blink and BOOM school as you know it transforms completely. You have quizzes every week, projects, netbooks, and research papers. No more staring at your notes for five minutes on line for math and acing the test. Don't even try it. Because if you do, you'll be explaining to your mom and dad that you need to stay after school for tutoring because you got a 55 on your quiz. At first it's like "Aah, no reason to freak. I've got four years to bring up my grades." But then you go back to sitting in a cafeteria while you're house leader's telling your mom your grades are slipping. And what happens when you go home? You're phone gets taken away and your mom buys you a geometry book you need to study out of an hour a night. Your dad looks you straight in the eye end tells you" You better bring up your grades or you're going to be reading the encyclopedia and working out of SAT books till your hands fall off". That's when you realize :high school isn't an episode of 90210 or like the movie Mean girls, where you sabotage everyone's reputation to win the heart of the cutest guy in school. You have to sit and study when you don't want to. You need to go tutoring and pay attention in class instead of laughing at fart jokes. Most importantly, though, you have to know when you need help and stop at nothing to get it. Because in the end, life is going to be filled with crossroads and questions that only you can answer for yourself, and let's face it: if you can't survive ninth grade, who's to say you'll get through life?

Just Write Anything

What is there to write about school? How we get hours of homework every night? How my day is longer than my mom's nine to five job? How I have to listen to teachers drone on about the Byzantine Empire and draw t-charts trying to prove triangles congruent? School is rigorous,to say the least, and there are some days I wake up in the morning and do not want to go to school and sit in a desk all day reading off a powerpoint and adhering to BRIDGE values. Some days I want to turn off my alarm and sleep till eleven and watch some Spongebob all day. But in the end, that's going to get you nowhere. I mean, yeah, school is hard and long and frustrating half the time, but so is life. And like life,you need to try your best and get over the fact that life sucks. I mean if everyone used the excuse that life is unfair to escape reality, we''d still be living in caves and sitting around a campfire making cave drawings like a neanderthal. I've found that in school, you need to find something that wakes you up in the morning :whether it's wanting to see your friends, or going to gym, because let's face it,your impetus isn't always " the thrill of learning something new."Otherwise you'll be pulling you're hair by its roots and yelling "Why me!"at the top of your lungs.So yeah, UCHS is maddening,but that's what makes it so unique. While everyone else is learning the anatomy of a plant or something, we're learning physics. We need to laugh in the face of adversity and doubt. We're going to get to college while everybody else is working at Mcdonald's and making fries, and this blog will be a documentation of our journey to college.