Lessons Learned This Year

This has become a tradition, compiling the multitude of things I have learned into a list.

The fact is that tomorrow is the last day of the year, of another of my life, where so many thing have happened, things that are both small and large, but valuable all the same.

And sadly, as life goes on, and I get older, I'll forget some of the things that I have learned in my life.

I'm hoping that I look back at this post, and one day this entire blog, when I'm writing for the Chicago Tribune, or the New Yorker, and remember what it was like to be a teenager in high school. teenager falling in love, getting ready for college, laughing, crying, and just living.

Things I've Learned this Year

1. Everyone should be in a musical
2. PERFECT practice makes perfect
3. University of Rochester is the place I want to be
4. My role model is now Lacey Sturm
5. I love eyeliner
6. The instyler does actually work
7. Facebook is addictive
8. Adam Levine's voice is amazing
9. Personality tests lie sometimes
10. I want be a journalist. Not just any journalist. One that changes the world.
11. I'm gorgeous :)
12. Macs aren't actually that complicated
13. They never tell you who the mother is on How I Met Your Mother
14. I love that I don't exactly fit in.
15. Eminem isn't the bet rapper alive. Who is, though, I don't know
16. Just because I'm a writer doesn't mean I can't struggle with English
17. Salad is delicious
18. French dressing is the best dressing
19. I never get tired of pizza
20. I can't cut hair
21. I only write songs when I'm heart broken
22. I'm the world's worst procrastinator
23. I desperately want a job
24. Converses are the best type of sneaker
25. I'm a hopeless romantic
26. Really bad movie are the best movies
27. College is actually real
28. Heartbreak always sucks
29. I have a big ego
30. Never have any regret
31. I can have a best guy friend
32. You cant save someone, no matter how hard you try. Only they can do that.
33. I can be hopelessly oblivious
34. I'm extremely disorganized
35. No matter what happens, I'm graduating high school in a year and a half

Holiday Thoughts

So in the light of the holidays thought it would be really helpful to look back and think about some things, especially since the end of the year is approaching in a matter of days. And through all of this thinking (and gift opening) I was wondering why it is that I've been so stressed.

Of course it's been because of school, but to me that 's much too vague. So as I ate delicious cheese cake, and enjoyed the beginning of my holidays, I continued to wonder why my stress level has been so high, and how it's been affecting me.

And that's when I realized that the reason I've been so stressed is because I have no stress release.

After this realization, I was immediately brought back to a Saturday morning where I woke up and the first thought on my mind was

"Jesus, I have APUSH homework."

Which then proceeded the daily stress induced hours of me making a mental checklist of all the homework I still didn't do.

Being brought back to that memory made me realize that the stress that I had would overwhelm me to the point where it was just always there.

And maybe I'm not the only one with that problem.

That said, it's time for me to figure out ha it is that can take that stress aay, so that I don't feel like my life is a huge clock, ticking away to my future.

What's the Difference?

They say that you should work on yourself after a break up. But nobody tells you how hard that is. Especially when you don't know what it is your feeling, and what it is you should do about it.
Because your head is telling you that you need to focus on your life, and at the time, this idea seems to be the best you've ever had, until you realize that your heart is telling you what seems to be the exact opposite.
And so once again the question of balance comes to mind.
I really feel like my posts are full of all these questions nobody is answering.
Because I really want to know: how do I differentiate between what should be done and what has to be done?

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

The Big Question

Teenagers have the tendency to forget about everything in the world but themselves, and I've always asked myself, why?
Are they being selfish?
I can't lie. That's partly it.
But I just realized something. It's not only the fact that teenagers are being completely self absorbed.
It's the fact that it seems like are 100 things going on in your life all of the time.
I mean, you're falling in love, finding yourself, realizing who your true friends are, arguing with your parents about whether what you actually feel for this guy is love, and then possibly even getting your heart broken, even though you're still trying to figure out if you were in love. Meanwhile, your grades seem to be fluctuating more than the stocks on Wall Street, and colleges are sending you mail daily, leaving you with a permanent headeache of all the things you must be doing wrong.
And through all of this, you're asking yourself,
What the hell is going on?
In the blink of an eye, your life feels like a show, flashing before you, escaping through your fingers and you think, these college emails are right;
time is ticking.
So the big question is, what are you supposed to do about this stress inducing chaos that is now your life? How do you balance all these things; love, friends, family, school, college, even yourself, all of which seemed to appear at the same time?

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

What do we do?

There seems to be a common theme to all of my recent posts, and it's been college. All
i can say is, that's the thought in my mind that hasn't disappeared since the beginning of junior year.
I mean it's been on the minds of all the juniors.
Like I've mentioned before, the time is ticking.
And that's exactly how it feels. Like a huge clock ticking in our heard constantly.
The concept of college excites me and terrifies me at the same time.
I'm excited to go and be on my own, to meet new people from different places and just talk to them. I'm excited to write about my life in college.
But then again, college looms over me and stresses me out, just like it does to the rest of the juniors.
Where am I going to be in a year and a half?
that question drives me insane, especially when I feel like junior year is the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life.
I mean, AP Bio? Who would think cells would be so complicated?
And English, the class I've always prided myself in, is the one where I have to read the most dense book I've ever encountered, where it takes me to 2 hours to read ten pages.
And once again, I'm not the only person feeling like this. Just have a conversation with any other junior in UCHS.
So I ask myself, what do we do?

How do we get past this? Because no matter what happens, the clock continues to tick.

The Clock is Ticking

The college process was always real to me, ever since I walked into the doors of WCCS and shook Ms. Kennedy's hand for the first time.
But now, as the years are passing, as time is ticking, the concept of college has gotten even more real.
As I thought about the last trip we recently had, I kept wondering, if college has always been on my mind, what makes this trip so different? Because in all honesty, those three days changed something in me, made me see my life differently. Made me discover what it is I want from college.
So I asked myself, what was different? Was it the different schools, the time?
As I looked back on the trip, though, I realized it wasn't any of these things.
It was the moments.
The moments that I had these epiphanies, about me and what I really want.
Like listening to my tour guide from The University of Rochester tell me, "This school isn't looking for well rounded people who seem to be good at everything. They want someone who has a passion for one specific thing."
Or being in an info session at RIT and hearing about its career focused curriculum, and writing seven words on my paper:

I don't want a school like this.

Or sitting on the floor in a room at Osewgo, talking to Journalists who started their own magazine, and thinking:
I want to do this.
These small moments are what made me realize, once again, just how close I am to going to college.
And it made me wonder:
Will I create my own major?
Will I start my own magazine?

What mark will I make in about a year and a half?

Because the reality is that I'll be in college in about a year and a half.

Whether or not it will be University of Rochester, or Syracuse, or University of Pennsylvania, I don't know.

All I know is that the clock is ticking.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

The Reality Is

Wow this is real.
Those words stuck with me as Mr. Baker stood at the front of the room, showing is pictures of the junior college trip.
"This trip isn't for fun," he said.
And he's right.
The words this is junior year ring in my ear constantly, especially during checkpoints when I'm staring at my grades and I have realized that I have failed two classes tor the first quarter.
Because that's the reality.
Thinking about that, its easy to let the stress consume you completely.
I mean, is a 69 really what a college like Syracuse is looking for?
Of course not.
But even though I really want to break down right now, I refuse to.
Becuase at the end of the day, I just need to ask myself,
What do I need to do?
What do I need to change?
Because the first quarter is done and over. So why look back wishing things could be changed, when its much better to say :Regrets? I have none.
One thing that I've realized this year is that success is all about knowing what works for you.
So instead of being hard on myself for the things I can't change, I'm going take a real look at myself. At where I want to spend four years of my life and what that means, at what my strengths and weaknesses as both a student and person are.

I'm pretty sure that's what all the juniors have to do.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Worth fighting for

There's an urge that I get- almost a hunger- and I can't help but pick up a pen and write.
As I sat in the cafetorium, staring at this beautiful boy that I never met, and unfortunately won't get a chance to, that urge washed over me.
I couldn't believe that someone so young and full of life could think taking it away was the answer.
And as I listened to his story, I was overcome with a wish.
A wish that I could know him. A wish that I could have watched one of his videos before he was gone. A wish to tell him that he wasn't alone.

That I was listening.

That even though I didn't fully understand his pain and struggles, I do know what it feels like to think that your words are echoing through the air without anyone hearing them.
And now that I'm too late, all I can do is make sure I don't forget him- Jamey Rodemeyer, a fourteen year old boy with a love for Lady Gaga, and a beautiful soul, writing and speaking beautiful words, just wanting to be heard.
It hurts knowing Jamey isn't the only one who has been lost to ignorance and hatred. And as we get older, and society changes, there are still people who contribute to taking the lives of people like Jamey. People with their whole lives ahead of them. People who love, laugh, and cry, just like all of us.
It baffled me that there are some individuals who still don't understand that.
That deep down, we all have insecurities. We all have dreams.

We are all human.

Learning about Jamey, I have realized that I don't want to be late for someone else.

I don't want there to be someone else.

And even though I'm only one person, I know that my words are powerful enough to help someone see that they are beautiful, that they do matter.

And that alone is worth fighting for.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

First two weeks

Organization is not my strong suit. I think everyone can agree on that. I just think its much easier for me to stuff everything into a folder and call it a day. Organizing binders? Too much work. It's much easier to have one place to put everything for me. Besides, I honestly believe that I need a daily dose of stress in my life to function. It runs in my family.
The only problem now, though, is that its affecting my grade. So that zero I got for my empty binder for Spanish is one of the reasons I have a 60 in collegiate prep.
Now, my initial reaction would be to rant about the injustice of my grade.
But that was what sophomore Michelle would have done.
Junior Michelle is much more insightful and mature.
Truththfully, I do understand the importance of organization, and I know that the explosion that is called my homework folder, isn't helping me at all.
I am grateful for a class that will help me with all the small things in college that can't be learned from a textbook.
It just isn't going to be easy for me.
Undoing habits never is easy.
That doesn't mean it isn't possible.
So even though I would rather keep my mountain of papers in that same folder, I will try to be organized in the spirit of junior year and trying new things.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Junior year

Being a junior is tremendous work.
From the first day, we were greeted by these bright eyed teachers preaching about leadership and the importance of this year. By the second day, we were learning new material, and getting ready for what lay ahead of us.
What lays ahead of us, you ask?
AP exams, regrets, the SATs, internships,
College.
All these deadlines are enough to give you a migraine right?
What I've realized over these past few days, however, is that there's so much more to junior year than deadlines.
At first glance, the year seems to be this enormous year full of decisions.
Decisions like, what college do I want to go to, or what career can I really see myself in?
Now this is true. These things are part of the chaos that is junior year.
But junior year is also about growth. Growth as a person, and as a student. It's about looking at yourself in the mirror, and picturing where you'll be in ten years, and asking yourself, I mean REALLY asking yourself,
Am I on the right track?
It's about being honest and facing reality, because college is no longer this distant dream.
It's the future.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

The end to the beginning

I was thinking about the purpose of this blog, and then wondered, why am I writing on it now even though I'm not in school?
Then I remembered.
This isn't only about school. This is about life. The life of someone who goes to my school. So my summer is completely relevant.
On the subject of summer, I remember the teachers in my school focusing on our plans for summer and preaching to us about how the emphasis should be on learning and not earning. Even through it all, the hallways were buzzing with conversations of all the money they planned to make in the summer.
Though sometimes I wish I had some of my own money in my pocket, I don't regret how I spent the majority of my summer.
Taking a class wasn't really something I wanted to do considering my days consisted of sitting in classes the entire rest of the year. This was supposed to be my break.
But I guess it's time for me to be brutally honest with myself. No matter how many things were on my summer bucket list, I would have spent my time watching spongebob, stuffing my face, and surfing the internet.
Instead of all that (real exciting huh?) I got to take a journalism class.
I got to finally see if this career I've been telling people about is really worth a shot.
It definitely is.
And maybe I did miss out on the spongebob marathons and staying up late to update my facebook status.
But in the end, those sacrifices were worth the fact that I now know how it feels to be edited line by line, I have a list of colleges that have journalism schools, and a wallet full of business cards from actual journalists. People who are living my dream and have told me how it feels, the good and the bad.
All in all, I think that's excactly what I needed.
And maybe I don't know where I'll be in ten years, who I'll be working for, if I'll be working for anyone. (A career as a freelancer has crossed my my mind).
It's pretty safe to say I don't know where my life will lead.
All I know is that I'll be living my life, and writing the entire way.
Even though today is the end of a summer adventure full of deadlines, interviewing, and editing, it's the beginning of a new era of my life.
The era of reporter Michelle.
And that, ladies and gentlman, is something to be excited about.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

What they don't tell you in fairytales

When you're a kid and you're young and innocent, you don't think about reality. You live in a dream and the fairytale of a perfect romance with true love's kiss.
What they don't tell you is what love actually feels like.
The butterflies, the fact that it feels as if your emotions are on steroids, all that stuff that they omit from all your typical fairytales.
They don't tell you that there are complications, and half the time it's out of your control. Because most of the actual feelings between two people are simple. It's as easy as, you make me laugh, and I love talking to you.
It's all the other stuff that you can't do anything about that makes it hard. School, busy schedules, overprotective parents.
And you're left thinking: I just want to be with you. Why is everything else getting in the way of us?
Soon enough, there's no turning back, because for once, you have actually broken down that wall you have up for everyone else. You can't imagine your life without them in it, and that's when you realize you're in love.
Of course, no one ever tells you this and you're left to fend for yourself like a lost puppy in the middle of a street. You don't know what you're doing.You've seemed to have lost all of your common sense, and you forget how to think, because you're too busy feeling.
So I'd love to ask the people who made up love stories like Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast:
what am I supposed to do?
Because I sure as hell don't know.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.2

Summer Musings

I felt like a New Yorker today. I had the same realization a New Yorker has when they move away: my school is not the center of the universe, and I don't know everyone. For six years, I have been able to proudly say that I knew everyone around me. and talked to them at least once. I guess the only way for me to have the epiphone that there were so many people I didn't have the pleasure of knowing came today as I walked into a room full of complete strangers.
It showed how small my world is. I live in one the biggest cities in the world, and being in a room of about 125 people I have never seen in my life before can be scary.
I realized though, that most people experience the same tumble of emotions and sudden shyness. It doesn't mean that they run away. It may feel easier to stay in your comfort zone in life and not have to experience moments such as the one described. That doesn't mean anyone should take the easy way out.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.2

Reflections of a teenage Rising Junior

So here we are, and the end of the year has gone and past. There is so much that I can say right now. As I sit here and wrestle with what should be said, my mind is brought back to a post I read written by the adorable Paul, someone who was a guest speaker for one of the last GSA meetings. One of the things that I remember about him, other than his eloquent opinion on race and sexuality, and amazing yellow shorts, was a blog post he wrote after his school year ended. He ingeniously compiled all of the lessons he learned in a list, something that didn't even cross my mind. So thank you Paul, for your clever way to reflect on the year without having to write an essay on a blog. Inspired by his list, I have created my own in honor of the memorable year I have had:

Lessons Learned in Sophomore Year

1. It's in Freshman's DNA to think that they are better than the upperclassman, when it is obviously not true.
2. No matter how hard you try, there are just some things that you are not good at. (It took me a whole year to figure that out).
3. Homework not being collected means there will be a quiz on it the next day.
4. Some people just don't change.
5. Teachers are human beings.
6. It is possible to live without eating meant, especially if it's Indian food.
7. Alicia Keys and Mariah Carey are amazing.
8. Never assume anything you don't actually know.
9. Being angry at the world is a waste of time.
10. Don't wear a strapless dress on a first date when it's cold.
11. Love doesn't have to be complicated, it can be beautifully simple.
12. High school isn't always like a scene form Mean Girls.
13. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
14. High heels can be really comfortable.
15. If a guy doesn't call you, call him. Just don't get obsessive.
16. It's perfectly okay if you have no idea where you'll be in ten years.
17. Chicago is beautiful.
18. Ellen Greene's voice is glorious.
19. Guys do cry.
20. Demi Lovato is my idol.
21. Twinkies are really hard to find.
22. There is no such thing as getting tired of Spongebob.
23. Pandora becomes your best friend when you're too lazy to update your iPod.
24. Including Lady Gaga in your global essay is just unheard of.
25. There is such a thing as a dumb question.
26. Watching yourself on a huge screen is embarrassing for everyone.
27. Have a plan B.
28. Having to talk out your problems doesn't make you crazy.
29. Not writing about love in a song is excruciatingly hard.
30. Listen to your conscious-no scratch that- OBEY IT.
31. Gel demolishes your hair.
32. The only thing more delicious than twinkies are swiss rolls.
33. There's no other school that would fit me better than the one I'm in right now.

Finally, I can take a breather

Wow, how long has it been? Weeks? Months?
I don't know for sure but I do know that I was so busy that I forgot that I had a blog.
Well that's a lie.
I distinctly remember thinking, I have to update my blog, but either passing out from exhaustion or remembering, oh crap I have to memorize all of act two for the show, or jeez we have an exam tomorrow in Algebra, and forgetting about it.
Even after the show and all the fame (please stop the applause it has already been a week since my debut) I have regents to worry about. Now I don't know what the motivation for some my classmates are, but I do NOT want to be a senior trying to pass the global regents, and I plan to go to Florida this summer, and that won't happen unless I ave those regents.
But today I decided to take a break and relax my neck after I've been bending over a barrons book for over an hour.
Even now as I'm writing this I'm thinking about going to sleep.
I'll say, that's true grit.
Good night loyal fans.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.0

It's time to be honest

It would be a lie to say that I didn't ever have any free time, or that I didn't know what I had to do to boost up my grade in the classes I have trouble with everyday. To be honest, it would be a lie to say I can't stay till 5:30 everyday for office hours. Technically I can.
But I don't.
I know I can try harder. I'm sure even the master mind Kevin can try harder than he already does. We all can.

Sometimes though, we just don't want to.

Now this post isn't meant to make anyone upset. It isn't meant to spark any future lectures either. It's meant to give some perspective. Some perspective on how we feel. No excuses, just honesty.

I don't like algebra. The fact that I have to put in over 150% effort, and I still fail infuriates me. I think Spanish class is extremely repetitive at times, and half the time I just want to go to sleep in Global, only because its my last class.
It isn't easy to be in school for all the hours we're in it. I think that these high expectations teachers have for us make them forget that we are just as normal as all the other high school students. We may be very uncommon, but we're still teens.
Judy like all of you may be uncommon teachers, but you're still people.
I think people forget that.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Its simple: Say What You Mean

So we all know those comments that are not outwardly rude, but when you think about it, they really are. Those little things people say that elude to what they really want to say, but they don't actually say it. Sarcastic comments and just annoying petty things that get on your nerves. The question today is, how do you deal with it? Do you confront it? Because that's your first instinct, to turn around and say, "And what is THAT supposed to mean?" Which sounds like a perfectly justified response. The only problem is, this really doesn't solve anything, because chances are the person you just confronted won't actually what they said into what they were trying to say in the first place. So your left upset at someone's cowardice, looking like you can't take a joke. Even though 99 percent of the time the subliminal isn't funny in any way.
So what do you do? Hurt your brain trying to untangle the puzzles that people tell you?
No way.
See what people don't realize is, life isn't Facebook. You shouldn't be talking as if you were reiterating one of your statuses you posted. It's simple really. Say what you mean and mean what you say. And if people like to throw subliminals at you and expect you to try to unfold the mystery they so "cleverly" wasted time on saying, don't.
If they really have something important to say, they can say it, not hint at it like this is some Shakespeare play or something, and your trying to say something without really saying it.
Truth is, I don't have time for it.
Who does?

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

How Long has It been?

A little bird told me that it has been a really long time since I have updated my very important and popular blog. Well all I can say is,
I've been busy.
My time is spent studying, acing my part as the amazing Audrey in the musical, and fulfilling my role as an editor in Chief for our highly anticipated magazine.
I speak for everyone when I say that we are ALL busy. What with regents and trying to excel in all our classes, I don't think that anyone even leaves at 3:45 anymore. It's an unspoken rule that everyone has to stay for at least one session of tutorial now, even if we're exhausted and just want to veg out in front of the television.
That shows a lot of growth on our part. Yeah, we still have trouble with prioritizing things, especially the nightly studying. Personally, I think that studying is against human nature, along with making your bed everyday, but maybe that's just me.
The year is almost over, and I think everyone is just realizing that. The summer is almost here, and we all have a lot to do before it arrives, but we also have a lot to be proud of. We're not done with the year, but looking at all the work we have done, and all the struggles we have overcome, we should ALL pat ourselves on the back.

The nonexistent time machine

Let me start this post by saying, do you know how many things would be saved from getting lost if you could go back in time? How many people have heard themselves saying, oh I wish I could go back in time to find that ____ (insert whatever is needed to be found in this blank). Been there, done that. Wait, no. I've actually lived there. (no not really but you get what I'm trying to say here, right?)
I bet that everyone has been victim of uttering the words, "if only I had a time machine..."
Well to everyone who reads this blog and says that, I've got a harsh reality for you. No one has invented the time machine yet.Yes its unbelievable and completely unfair, I know.

So why do we still say it?

I'll tell you why. At those moments where we're completely out of it and not paying attention to our surroundings, we lose things. We put them down, and never pick them up. We throw out bags with things still in them. I mean the list goes on and on. And since we can never get them back most of the time, we need hope that in the future, we'll have that amazing time machine that we can use to pinpoint where in the world we left those pocketbooks nd jackets that we lost.
Well unfortunately for us, we don't have this amazing life saver called a time machine.
We just have ourselves.
So together, we should look back, and remember all of those things we never saw again because of that nonexistent time machine and remember them. And then realize it was because of our careless state of mind, not the nonexistent time machine, that we lost them in the first place.
Think about that as you wonder where it is your phone went, or what ever happened to that scarf you haven't seen since last month.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

The beginning

So I'm not an organized person. Not at all. Personally I think it's against human nature to be organized, because it's just so much easier to not have to be neat. Who wants to make their beds, or have a to do list, or have specific places for things?
Turns out I do.
I know what I said before, and a part of me still agrees with it. But I want to change that. I've realized losing things constantly and not knowing what day it is and procrastinating gets harder to deal with when you don't have parents to replace things and your only worry is school. What happens when I'm all grown up?
Here's a secret that I'll probably deny if someone asks me about: one of my greatest fears is that I won't be able to make it on my own. I'll be too dependent on the people who support me to support myself. I won't be able to get a job and will have to move in with my parents.
Because here are the facts: In TWO YEARS I'm going to college. That means I'm on my own for the rest of my life. Even though I can't wait to get out of my house, that's still one of the scariest things I can think of.
The thing is, I don't wanna lose things anymore, or have a huge folder that I have to look through to find everything. I don't wanna wake up late every morning to have to run out to catch the bus that I'll miss. Most of all, I don't wanna be doing these things at college, when I'm 27, or worse, for the rest of my life.
So I vow to change. I vow to make to do lists and never lose a phone again. I vow to stop blasting my music to surround sound while I'm outside and actually look where I'm going. I vow to stop putting crap in the pockets that I don't close and hope that it doesn't fall out. I vow to not wait till 9:30 at night to study for algebra on a Sunday when I had all weekend to do it. I vow to do my laundry without my mom nagging me about it and having to do it herself, and to take out the garbage every night. I vow to start writing in my agenda again and so I don't have to guess what the homework for the tonight is.

And I vow to record my entire journey of becoming a more responsible person right here on this blog.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Can I get some Hindsight, Please?

Apparently while I was at home sick today, there was an incident in which people were suspended for vandalism. When I was informed that it was vandalism I expected the worst: graffiti on the building, writing in the bathroom stalls. So of course I was surprised when the vandalism was actually students carving into wet cement. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I was under the impression that the sidewalk was property of the city, not UCHS.

Why are they being punished so severely then?

I understand that they shouldn't have done it. The real question is, should they have to miss three days of school to learn that?
Isn't that a tad excessive?

I was also informed of the fact that for one student, there was no proof that they were a part of the wet cement carving. Regardless, they were reprimanded as well. They were sentenced to three days of suspension.
For a person who merely hears about it, it feels like that; a sentencing. We see it as extreme and not understandable.
So for this post, I would love for the the teachers who read this to share their position on this issue. Do you think the punishment given was just? Is there something that I don't know about the incident that would justify the circumstances? Maybe if your opinions are disclosed, we would further understand the thinking behind the punishment. Because to be perfectly honest, these instances that we can't wrap our heads around are part of the reason why people decide to transfer schools. And even if this issue isn't that important for some of you, the fear of more people leaving us definitely is.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

This isn't Mean Girls

Now we all know stereotypical high school: you've got the nerds and the geeks, the loners, the kinda popular people, the wannabees, and the queens bees. Now I've seen my share of teen movies and I know how these popular people work, with theory too big ego and imaginary crown that gives them the invisible power to be the united rulers of the school. It was my assumption that UCHS wasn't cliche enough to have the same problem.
Well I guess I wrong.

It turns out our school is exactly the same.
Apparently there's a social ladder that establishes who you are as a person, and rules about where you should SIT because of it. Now did I miss something? Last I checked, anyone could sit ANYWHERE they wanted. Is it just me? Do certain people OWN tables now? Were they auctioned off in the last auction? Because maybe I wasn't looking hard enough, but I don't see ANYONE'S NAMES on tables. So why do people have the AUDACITY to tell ANYONE where they don't belong? Is that how it is now? We have specific tables that we must sit in at all times? Did I miss the memo? Is it in the student handbook:

Rule 3.1 Section SOCIAL HIERARCHY: STUDENTS MUST SIT IN THEIR TABLE AT ALL TIMES. Failure to adhere to this VERY SERIOUS RULE will result in an automatic SUSPENSION.

REALITY CHECK:
IT ISN'T.
And I'm tired of people who assume that it is, that they can rules the school as if this is the next teen movie.
News flash:
IT ISN'T.
I'm not going stand by and watch while some people attempt to order people around as if they were our dictator. This isn't The Soviet Union. Nobody dictates what we do and my friends and I will sit wherever I want. If anybody thinks that they can pretend that they are the kings and queens of the school they better come back to the real world.
Once again,
This is UCHS, NOT Mean Girls.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Here I come World

You know that moment when you finally realize what you want to spend the rest of your life doing? That tiny moment where everything seems to make sense and you final understand why you were put here in this world? A bit dramatic, yes, but that's what I experienced recently.
I finally realized why I want to be a journalist, why I plan to attend Syracuse and major in Public Communications, why I'm going to move to Chicago after college and write for the Chicago Tribune.
This epiphany was jumpstarted by a conversation I had with my father about our current newspaper. I expressed my concern that our newspaper did not do what a newspaper should do, give voice for the students who sometimes felt deprived of it, bring the truth to the people around us. My dad looked at me and told me,"If you don't like it, do something about it. Make it your job to create a newspaper that represents the voices of the students and unifies them even more.

Isn't that what a journalist would do? "

That moment was the second that I discovered that that is exactly what be to be done. This would be the beginning to my endless journey to bring truth and justice to the world through words. This I'm what I'm supposed to do.
Therefore, this post is my promise to make that dream come true. And the first thing I need to do is make sure this school has a newspaper that will continue to provide news and the honest truth to the people who read it long after I graduate and become a reputable journalist for the Chicago Tribune.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

Littlle Shop Little shop of Horrors

Well, the day, came, went and past. The list went out (and yes I was on it) and we've already had the first rehearsal. It's amazing how fast it's all going. Soon enough, it'll be the opening night and I'll bhe on stage with about twenty of my peers, singing and dancing for a huge audience. it actually doesn't scare me. I'm as excited as I can possibly be. I can't wait to show myself and everyone else the side of me that I never knew existed. I know it will be the hardest thing I've ever done, but I want this too much too even thinking about giving up. And I'm pretty confident that i can speak for the entire cast in that statement.

Speaking of the cast, for anyone who lives under a rock, the main principal roles for this show are:

Justin-Seymour
Me-Audrey
Alenson-Mr. Mushnick
Lamont-Orin
Jovan-Audrey two
The Doowop Girls
Daysha
Nicolette
Nayo
Raven Cruz

Of course there are so many more people who make the musical beautiful, all the people in the chorus who have parts, songs, and dances to step to.Unfortunately, I have neither the time nor energy to write all their names out. just know, chorus, you won't be forgotten, especially when you leave the audience in awe after the song Skid Row.

Quarterly Week

Well here we are, once again, getting ready to take huge exams that are 15 percent of our grades. Everyone is stressed out and racking their brains to remember all the things we have learned this year. There are classes where we know once we look at the test we'll get that sinking feeling that we will completely fail this test. I don't want to feel that way about any test, and I know that I am not the only one. It's natural for us to feel stressed out about all the studying we have to do for every class. The quarter is almost done, but right now it feels as if the year has barely begun. It can become really challenging to balance school and being a human being. I've been in situations where I'm so stressed out that I can't think straight. It can really disable you and consume you to the point where you live and breathe what your grades are. Take it from someone who spent her middle school years feeling trapped in a figurative box of perfection because of the stress of grades, balance is very important. It's still hard for me to not get too carried away with grades and academics. You burn yourself out that way, and then you're stuck being exhausted and miserable but at the same time anxious to the point of insanity.

A Word to the Teachers

I'm being honest when I say that this school is exhausting. All the class time, tests, quizzes, presentations, projects, and everything else we busy ourselves with can really drain us both physically and emotionally. Personally, by the end of the day on Friday, I'm so anxious to go home and enjoy the weekend that the minutes crawl by at a ridiculously slow rate. After a whole week, I just want to go home and relax, hang out and play Zumba on my Playstation Move, and watch endless hours of Spongebob. It's hard to be focused on the last class on Friday. I should know, because I struggle with maintaining my focus all the time. It''s easy to get sucked into all the distractions. This Friday,for example, I got into an argument with one of my classmates because I was irritated and thought they took something of mine. I understand I shouldn't have argued- I get that. What I don't understand, though, is why I was the one who got a talking to after class even though I wasn't the only contributing to the argument. It frustrates me that every time I do something wrong, the teachers are ready to pounce on me with this long lecture that is drowning with disappointment. They should know by now that I will be the first one to admit my that I made a mistake and apologize. Which is exactly what I did on Friday. So why do teachers have it in their heads that scholarly students such as I shouldn't be able to make mistakes? Why do have we to get the long speeches about how we should have known better?
I know what the response will be: "Students like you and all the others with your qualities are the leaders of the school who need to be the examples of the school".

But I pose one question:is it right to make someone feel like they can never make a mistake? To put them in a box of perfection because they are the leaders of the school? Would you not do the same thing if you were in my situation? I do laugh, I do argue back when someone yells at me. I'm human and I have those days where I'm not in the mood to participate, or don't feel like being in school.
Doesn't everybody?
I think teachers forget that. It's almost as if they perceive me as this person that can be displayed like a trophy during meetings and presentations.

So I write this on behalf of all the students who feel the same way I do:It wasn't that long ago that the you all were our age, trying to balance academics and social freedom. If you would just look back and try to remember what it felt like to be stuck in school when all you wanted to do was go home, or hang out with your friends. Students who make it their duty to succeed and do the right thing the majority of the time, students like the peers who chosen to be ambassadors, all we ask for is some empathy from you teachers who hold us so highly. We already have pressure to be at the top of the class by everyone we love, including ourselves. All we really want is for you to understand that, and to get the benefit of the doubt that we know what we did was wrong and that we'll redirect ourselves like we always do.

The Countdown

I think I speak for everyone when I say that Ms. Algozo is a very moving speaker. Her last speech was just as spine tingling as all the others. It was evident that her words brought a lot of us back to reality. We are indeed only two short years away from college. It is not the time to "derail the class" as Ms. Algozo so eloquently stated numerous times earlier today. All of our actions can influence not only us, but everyone we are surrounded by as well. We need to remember it is not only us fighting for an education, but also 32 others who dream of attending Syracuse, Brown, Michigan, and all the other prestigious colleges we dream of. Sometimes it's scary to think about how small my graduating class will be when the big day comes soon enough. I hope that that the tenth graders that I share classes with and see in the hallways will be standing on that stage with me, tears of pride in their eyes. It's hard to say, but I don't know that what is left of our family will have the honor to graduate in 2013 with all the high school requirements under their belts. All that I know is that I will be standing up there, diploma in my hand and gratification in my heart.
For me, high school is just a countdown. A countdown to when I can finally attend Syracuse, choose the classes that I love, and finally be free of labels, and identity crises. A countdown to my dream job as a writer for the Chicago Tribune, LA News, or even NY Times. A countdown to living in a condo with big windows and high ceilings. In all honesty, I know that these two years will be anything but easy, but my path is clear along with my mind and I know what has to be done in order to make my dream come true. It's like the adorable Zach Gilford says to Alexis Bledel in the movie Post Grad, "You got the hard part figured out. You know what you wanna do. Now you can just spend the rest of your life going after it."

A Saturday to Remember with Ms. Gala

Today, I had the pleasure of going to Manhattan and eating delicious Indian food with my best friend Kinyanna, Ms. Gala, and her brother. The food was delectable and very different from what I was accustomed to. It was initially a bit uncomfortable to eat most of the food with my hands, but after a while, I forgot about it and just enjoyed the food. Since neither Kinyanna or I had ever really explored Indian food, Ms. Gala and her brother expertly chose a few dishes that they thought were good and I have to say they did an amazing job. I thought all of the food was delicious and unlike anything I had ever tasted. Kinyanna and I thought that it was hilarious that there was a breakfast dish that resembled a doughnut. We tasted it and it was the opposite of sweet; savory, actually. There was a mango shake that Ms. Gala recommended that was like eating the best mango yogurt ever made and was perfect for cooling my mouth when the food got just a little too spicy. Our conversations were very interesting as well, varying from both the good and bad books we have read for school in the past years to how Kevin Ozoria's title should be "The only boy you could date who would get your parent's approval." Needless to say, I am glad that I chose to raise my paddle in the auction for this trip. Not only was the food a taste to remember forever, the time I spent with my best friend, Algebra teacher, and her brother was perfect for a day where I would have most likely done absolutely nothing at home. Thank you Ms. Gala for:

1. An awesome opportunity to try something new and get to know you better
   
2. Letting your brother invite himself
   
3. Allowing me a chance to get to know you better

This is definitely something I wouldn't mind doing again (including the food of course).

Countdown to Litlle Shop of Horrors!

Well the cat is out of the bag because of me!( By the way, who made that weird saying? Mr. Bobrow would know, seeing as it will probably be on a global grit one of these weeks) I found out that the musical this year is............drum roll for those who are unaware..................

Little Shop Of Horrors!

I've seen the movie before, a long time ago, and all I really remember is the big plant that says, "Feed me Seymour!" Well, I looked it up a bit, and came up with this list:

1. I love Audrey, Seymour's love interest. (Hint hint Mr. Campbell and Ms. Rose)
   
2. I think the chorus is amazing and I adore their clothing throughout the movie.
3. Audrey's boyfriend that is the dentist in my opinion is an alter ego of Lamont Sadler
   
4. I never get tired of the songs Skid Row and Suddenly Seymour.
   
5. I can't wait for auditions and casting because i know I want to be a part of this masterpiece.

Mr Campbell revealed that auditions are being held in February for all the people who, like me, are excited. Countdown to February!!!

I want

When I'm fresh out of college, I want to work in a big building, with these huge glass windows. I want to have a little cubicle surrounded by other people who share the same love of writing that I do. I want to have meetings with my coworkers brainstorming about what the next issue of the magazine should look like, or what should be written about next in the newspaper. I want to have the satisfaction of seeing my name in print in a newspaper. I want to live on a pretty street full of trees and brownstones in a little apartment that kind of looks like crap, but I love it because it's all mine.I want to work in the midst of a city with people all around me in business suits, pencil skirts, and high heels.I want to go to a coffee shop every morning for breakfast. I want to fall in love and kiss on the doorstep of my tiny apartment after a date.
And after I get tired of that, I want to be able to say that I'm moving up to be editor, or on to a higher building, or a house.
One thing I know for sure, though, is that no matter what happens, my dream of writing for a living will never diminish.